The planet Pluto was “demoted” nearly six years ago to “dwarf planet 134340 Pluto”, and quite frankly it still rankles The Bear that we no longer have a planet “Pluto” anywhere in our solar system.

20120626-203009.jpgLook at that meteor-scarred globe; it’s only about 1/3 the size of our own moon, but check out how solid and spherical it is. Why couldn’t that be a planet?

Ok, sure, astronomers have found a number of other rock-and-ice chunks of similar size in the Kuiper belt (including one even larger than the celestial object formerly known as Pluto) but for those among us who have grown up with a plant Pluto, ya gotta understand how we feel.

It’s as if a significant portion of the rug known as reality has been pulled out from under us.

Like other planets, Pluto has moons, four of them that we know of, and the largest of them even has a name — Charon.

The planet “Pluto” was named after the Greek mythological god of the Underworld, also known as Hades, a name which has become synonymous with the Christian idea of hell and damnation. But among the Greeks, Pluto was better known as the shepherd of the afterlife, the keeper of souls.

Thing is, it’s not so much the planet we miss as the name. I mean, we even have a Disney cartoon character that shares the same name. It’s part of the human psyche. It’s not a bad name.

So here’s a proposal. I say we rename the planet Uranus to Pluto. I mean how many of us would really miss a planet named “Uranus” anyway? After all, we aren’t even sure how to pronounce it.

Is it like “urine-us” or “yer-anus” ? Either way it congers up some unsavory images. I say we just ditch that stupid moniker and rename it “Pluto.”

That way we can solve two problems at once; we can get rid of a lousy name and replace it with a beloved name that we aren’t ashamed to discuss in polite company. What do we know about “Uranus” anyway beyond the fact that it’s embarrassing to mention in public?

Anyone up for a petition drive to rename “Uranus” to “Pluto?” Sign up here.

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1 Comment on Reinstating Pluto

  1. Tame Bear says:

    Obviously I’m all for renaming the planet Uranus to Pluto. You with me?

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